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:iconintimachine: More from intimachine


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Submitted on
October 13, 2007
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reinforced linguistics spar across wrinkles
pink and shriveled — bathwater-fingers —
but a silk-smooth tongue will stiff your stuttering,
and send us off soaring, straight inside the sun.

but should you slip?
stray from your softer side, while
    fragile eyes
    sterilize —
    drug-induced
    euthanized
    animal
        seizure lines —
    preaching to the choir
        massing after columbine?

so incredible
just how credulous
you have become.

streaked with rain and dressed with shame
    but smiling, shining, teeth remain?
        the same complaints
        compelled the saints!
        commandments made,
        and who abstains?
        earthquake trains,
        crashing planes,
        purple stains
        of bruising pain,
        

        portraits fade
        with souls engraved?
    still she'll say
    "i'll never change."


    'til silksand words
    strike your chest
like a photo-finish;
    seduction and attraction, hand in hand,
together, softly grip

hands still soaked
on the edge of your mind,
    perspiring fingers
    agrip cliffside —
a moment to a second
    left to decide:


    "do I say hello?
        or move straight to goodbye?"



for me, it was the latter:
    a hallway with a ladder
    built for walking under
    tearing my
                good luck asunder.


a goregon gaze
in a broken mirror
and my heart now
is hard as stone.
erm.. so this was in my scraps as well as my actual gallery, for whatever reason. I decided to delete it from my scraps to clean up a bit, but it seems it deleted it from both galleries...

/SIGH

but I was able to salvage it through clever uses of the back button. hurrah!

but now I'm missing all those great comments from you all. ;( ah well.

as always.. comments welcome&appreciated.
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:iconmesmeric-revelation:
mesmeric-revelation Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2007
"do I say hello?
or move straight to goodbye?"

that line is beautiful, this entire piece has such excellent movement. :)
Reply
:iconintimachine:
intimachine Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2007
that line seems to be the crux of the piece, for sure. thank you very much, my friend!
Reply
:iconmesmeric-revelation:
mesmeric-revelation Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2007
you're very welcome :)
Reply
:iconspamuel:
Spamuel Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2007   Writer
The last two stanzas are nowhere near as good as the rest of the piece.
the Columbine reference grabbed my attention, and once you'd got it you didn't fail to impress. nice work.
Reply
:iconintimachine:
intimachine Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2007
yeah, I often considered ending the piece at "or move straight to goodbye?", because the two last stanzas definitely are weaker than the rest of the poem; however, the two images presented therein are two I ended up liking too much to let go of.

thank you for the comment! :]
Reply
:iconfoschia:
Foschia Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2007
Really beautiful. It feels as natural as breathing, but strange and exotic at the same time. Nice work!
Reply
:iconintimachine:
intimachine Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2007
goodness! such a wonderful compliment. thank you!
Reply
:iconfllnthblnk:
fllnthblnk Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
Hahaha... Saw your feature, Erich. Good job!
Reply
:iconintimachine:
intimachine Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2007
oy!
Reply
:iconthefavoritesproject:
TheFavoritesProject Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2007
Your poem has been featured! [link]
Reply
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